Many of my clients desire to create relationships in their lives. Especially with Valentine’s Day right around the corner, many people feel pressure in this regard. It seems that everywhere we look, someone is in love, someone is in partnership. It can seem painful, especially if a person desires a relationship but doesn’t know where to where to begin. This reality offers up such gems as books that tell you how to be ‘date-able’, lists of things to do or NOT to do in order to capture a mate, online dating services, match-making services, social media sites and even speed-dating.
Can you see how all of these things removes your ability to choose for yourself? It’s as if this reality is saying, “You don’t know what’s best for you. We’ll tell you.”
No one knows more about you than you do! I encourage my clients to begin by creating a relationship with themselves! How can you sense what you’d like to create in relationship if you don’t have intimacy with yourself first?
Intimacy has to do with honor, trust, gratitude, vulnerability and allowance.
If you are willing to create a relationship with yourself, you have to be willing to be honest with yourself and in honesty there is honor. It’s a willingness to honor yourself with what actually works for you, not for somebody else.
Intimacy with oneself is the willingness to trust you with no judgment. As children, we are often taught to judge ourselves out of existence.
Honoring the self first, knowing ourselves intimately as the ever-changing energies that we are, is the key to not becoming lost in the desire for relationship. It is the way in which we gain a deep and
clear knowing of who we truly be, and a resonant honoring of that being.
Once we learn to continually cultivate this knowing of ourselves, we can create the relationships we desire. These will be relationships in which we do not allow any part of our being-ness to be cut off, sacrificed, or given away in deference to the relationship, or the other person in it.
A great tool to begin intimacy with oneself: Write down one thing you are looking for in a partner.
Now ask yourself, “Am I willing to be this for me?”
You must be the vibration of what you are asking for. If not, you will not attract someone who has the characteristics you desire!
Begin by creating intimacy with yourself, and you will then be ready to choose a partner who can contribute to the beautiful being you truly be!
For even more on creating you in relationship, join Right Relationship for You™ for a special week of Valentine’s Day events!
In the comments below, I’d love to hear from you.
Let’s get a discussion going on creating the relationships you desire: Tell me the one thing you’re looking for in a partner and if you’re willing to be it for you.
You might be chosen to receive a FREE 15-minute personal consultation!
Thank you as always for visiting. I’m so grateful you’re choosing more of you.